As Pride 2020 falls victim to COVID quarantine restrictions, we must reinforce the truth that Pride is internal..

This June marks the 50th Anniversary for the Gay Pride Parade and we find ourselves faced with the opportunity to prove that our pride goes beyond the parades. Due to COVID-19 and ‘Stay At Home’ orders around the globe, many Pride 2020 events have been cancelled. Event organizers decided early, back in March, that the events would be cancelled, as many in the LGBTQ community are no strangers to epidemic. Suffering our very own AIDS Epidemic in the 80’s and 90’s, we know all to well what not taking enough precaution looks like. So no, we won’t have the big parades outdoors, and we won’t have the festivals across the nation. But we do have the pride of knowing and loving ourselves for who and what we truly are, and have become in this nation.

Now, as we watch the news, we see that our brothers and sisters in the Black community are fighting the same fight we fought almost 50 years ago. Police brutality towards all minorities has finally come to light in many videos, and protesters everywhere are saying, ‘Enough is enough!’ We stand with anyone that has been brutalized for who and what they are, feel, or love, for this is a country that was founded on the principals of FREEDOM. We can all never truly be free, as long as some of us are oppressed. We will continue to fight with our brothers and sisters against inequality in any community.

You know what other injustices we are fighting against? The injustices of unsatisfying sex and unfulfilled fantasies. In our previous blogs we talked about healthier habits (that include sex) while under quarantine orders and how fantasies can, and actually should, become realities. This time we are going to talk about standing up for your rights to party safely, and have great sex with our very own Pride 2020, Gay At Home Orders.

What are these Gay At Home Orders, you ask?

They are simply a list of rules you should follow if you are LGBTQ family, and want to stand up for your right to engage pridefully, in beautiful sexual adventures, while at home, amid dual crises sweeping the nation and globe. They are a liberating bunch of directives given to you, that want to remember Pride 2020 as the year you went deep inside (oh yea) to express your queer, rather than parading it on the streets. They are commands for all LGBTQ to show the internal pride that resides in our hearts, our minds, and our genitals!

Rule No. 1

Celebrate Pride 2020, Gay-er at Home, with a new toy for you, a friend, a partner, or all of the above. Toys are going to be all the difference between you enjoying a gratifying Pride at home, or a very isolated and unsatisfied affair. Anal beads and butt plugs for the rear explorers, vibrators and strap-on dildos for the lezzies looking for a vibin’ pound party, or whips and restraints for the proud BDSM mafia. Whatever your Pride expression entails, getting a new toy for the celebration is going to greatly enhance your Gay At Home experience.

Rule No. 2

If you’re having a small male gathering in your ‘Quarantine Bubble,’ be sure everyone is following along with COVID restrictions including social dick-stancing. Each party-goer should be minimum six inches away and have a hard-on to enforce the proper dick-stance guidelines. Gentle strokes of each rod may be performed periodically to ensure the rules are not violated and every boy is aware of the space between them.
If you’re having a small female gathering within your QB, be sure to use face coverings as droplets of female pleasure can be found all over amid this pandemic. Remove the mask as need to perform essential duties like mouth-to-mouth procedures. For maximum protection against a dry and terrible ordeal, be sure to have plenty of lube before inserting any vaginal swabs, for testing her pleasure.

Rule No. 3

Always use PPE when engaging in rambunctious, rapturous, sexual eruptions, as you do not want to contract any microorganisms that may never leave you. Lube is always instrumental in decreasing the percentage of tears and chafing during the hottest moments of ecstasy. Proper lubricants can turn any dry fling, into a roaring rapid of release, when used properly. Condoms and dental dams are also recommended as PPE during this pandemic. Safety first. Orgasm Second (wink, wink).

Rule No. 4

The final rule for the Pride 2020, Gay At Home Orders, is to always exercise caution when going into unknown territories. Research the area(s) and ask questions to avoid later infection. During a pandemic, you can’t be too cautious, so protect yourself and others, by careful interactions in safe spaces where all protective restrictions are met. Once you feel safe, everyone’s been tested and have shared results, feel free to have the best time exploring this new territory. Coronavirus has many friends and we want you to be able to avoid them all, or keep your exposure to a minimum while enjoying your Pride celebration.

There you have it, your very own Pride 2020, Gay At Home Orders, here to make sure you party responsibly this year during a very crucial moment in history. Always drink responsibly, and be sure you utilize taxi and food delivery services to avoid driving drunk or under the influence. To be able to have a great Pride season safely, and to live to fight on another day, is our only wish for you all this June 2020.

Until next time..